When compliments become a cultural minefield

FROM one culture to another, certain compliments can, at best, seem weird or unexpected, and at worst, sound inappropriate or just plain offensive. To mark World Compliment Day, March 1, here's a look at some phrases that you might not see coming, or which you might be tempted to take the wrong way.

Even with the best possible intentions, paying someone a compliment can be a more perilous exercise than you might think. While it's usually wise to avoid paying people unsolicited compliments on their physical appearance ("Have you lost weight?"), beware too of cultural differences. Because from one country to another, a comment that might be intended as flattering can sound insulting, and vice-versa ...

"Love your hair!"

Complimenting someone on their hair may seem like a safe bet, so long as you don't fall into discrimination or stereotyping. It's also wise to avoid phrases like: "Oh I much prefer that to your previous haircut!" Ouch!

But when cultures collide, be prepared for some surprises. In China, for example, it's not uncommon to be complimented on the blackness of your hair. Not so much for the intensity of its color, but for the vitality that this symbolizes. In fact, black hair is perceived as a sign of excellent health in the country.

"You have such straight legs!"

In Asia, it isn't unusual to compliment someone with long legs, literally with the expression "to have straight legs." It's a way of extolling the virtues of the long, thin body shape, in line with the persisting cult of thinness, and is often directed at women.

"That's disgusting, thanks. Can I have some more?"

Sometimes compliments can also sound a lot like insults. In Québec, the French term "écoeurant," which usually means "disgusting," can sometimes be used to express excellence. So don't get offended if someone in Montréal tells you your lovingly prepared meal is "Hum, écoeurant!" because they're probably paying you a compliment.