MH17 crash aftermath, an agonising wait for families seeking proper burial

In a small, stucco-roofed home just outside Kuala Lumpur, grieving family members sat in silence on mats and carpets on the floor. Malaysia's 24-hours news channel played softly in the background. They were waiting for news — any news — of what has become of their beloved "Rina," a flight attendant who was aboard Malaysia Airlines Flight 17 when it was shot out of the sky last week.

Families of the victims now face a fresh agony — watching the fate of their loved ones' remains play out on international TV, as rebels limit access to the crash scene and international mediators struggle to determine what has become of the bodies.

Azlin Yakob, 43, whose sister was a flight attendant for Malaysia Airlines, said she is holding out hope that Azrina Yakob's body will be found.

"At least — hopefully! — we can still bring back her remains and give her a proper burial," Yakob said.

The wait has disrupted the traditional burial practices for Muslims and Buddhists. It recalls the experience of the families caught in Malaysia's other horrific air tragedy, the disappearance of Flight 370 in March, in which families delayed last rites and prayers and five months later still do not have grave sites where they can mourn. Muslim rituals, for example, call for bathing corpses and wrapping them in plain cloth usually on the day of death.

Shahidan Kassim, 48, a businessman who is the brother of Dora Shahila Kassim, the chief attendant on Flight 17, said that every time he sees TV footage of the yellow body bags, his heart lurches.

"It's been more than three days. We've accepted the fact that she is gone," he said. "But we will be thankful to God to have her remains to bury her."

Rohani Abdul Karim, Malaysia's women, family and community development minister, met with some of the victim families Sunday at a local Marriott hotel to show support.

"All of them have the same wish — which is to bring back whatever remains of their loved ones so that there will be a proper burial, ritual rites, as well as graves for them to visit," she told reporters after the meeting.

Forty-four Malaysians died in the Flight 17 crash in eastern Ukraine on Thursday, including 15 crew members. Among the victims was a family of six who had been on holiday in Europe before returning to Malaysia after living the last few years in Kazakhstan: wife Ariza Gazalee, husband Tambi Jiee, who worked for Shell, and four children, Afruz, Afzal, Afif and Azmeena.

"We are full of sorrow," Ariza Gazalee's uncle, Shakri Anuar, 57, said in a telephone interview from the city of Kuching.

At Azrina Yakob's house Sunday, her husband sat playing with their two small children, Arissa Raisha, 3, and Aqil Raif, 6, while surrounded by relatives.

Her brother-in-law, Zulkifli Abdul Rahman, 54, said the boy was playing with the cousins and saw the wreckage of the plane on TV.

"He said, 'Mommy went to work, but the plane exploded,' " he said.

Sister Azlin recalled her as a "joyful" woman who was a star athlete and played a Malaysian sport called net ball and ran track in high school.

She had majored in hotel management in college, but after she got her certificate, the sister encouraged her to go to an open call for flight attendants and apply Azrina was hired and worked for the airline for 20 years.

The sisters had kept in daily contact and has been texting about the family's planned reunion next week to celebrate the end of Ramadan, Azlin said, with a feast that included Azrina's favorite noodle dish, laksa. In their final text, Azrina had also teased her sister by saying she should apply to be a contestant on a cooking reality show.

"It's my only sister," Azlin said, weeping. "We were normal sisters — we used to quarrel and then make up. But always we talked."

Yakob sent one last text before her sister boarded the plane. It asked, "When are you going back?"