"When I see him, I want to kick his butt," said Asan Ahmad, jokingly.
However, the sadness in his eyes when he said this was unmistakable. Asan was relating what he would do to his cousin should the latter come back -- if he returns at all.
Asan and Andrew Nari -- the 49-year-old chief steward of the ill-fated Malaysia Airlines Flight MH370 that disappeared without a trace -- are cousins.
The boys grew up together, raised by their grandmother in Sarawak. They did almost anything and everything together from when they were kids up to their teens.
They only went their separate ways when they began their career paths. Andrew became a flight steward while Asan pursued journalism.
Despite their tight schedules, the boys made it a point to meet up at least once a month. Asan last met Andrew in 2013 when one of their aunts passed away. They managed to spend a week together before they both had to return to work.
A week before Andrew was designated to fly on the Beijing-bound MH370, he called Asan and said he wanted to see him after he returns.
According to Asan, Andrew always flew to Europe, so it was unusual when his cousin told him that he would be flying to Beijing instead.
"There was something he wanted to discuss, he said. This saddens me the most because now, I will never know what he wanted to tell me, or if ever I get to see him again," he told Astro AWANI, recently.
Asan said when he learned of the news about MH370 on that fateful March 8, it was already later in the day. Instantly, he went to his cousin's house to be with Andrew's wife, Melani Antonio, and mother, Catherine Tamoh. That day, Andrew's house was filled with family members and close friends, he said.
The Naris household are normally a boisterous crowd. But on that day, it was the silence that was deafening. Everyone was speechless, only sobs were heard once in a while when the ladies couldn't fight back tears.
Asan said all they need right now is some legit updates, even better, proof. Proof that the plane crashed or lives have actually been lost, or proof that it was an accident. Any proof all that could make the Jan 29 declaration by the Department of Civil Aviation (DCA) legit and digestible by the next-of-kin.
Little comfort
A year on, the search continues.
On March 1, Australia had announced it was conducting trials with Malaysia and Indonesia on a system that increases the tracking of aircraft over remote oceans, allowing authorities to quickly react to abnormal situations.
Although the system was a "world first", it was "not a silver bullet", only helping to improve current methods of tracking ahead of other solutions being developed.
For MH370 families and friends, whatever effort now brings nothing but little comfort.
Many are still reeling from the shock of the DCA declaring MH370 an "accident" and all passengers on board had been "presumed dead", including 27-year-old Grace Subathirai. She had lost her mother on the flight, Anne Daisy, 56.
"It (the announcement) came from nowhere. They had barely established the plane had veered towards a particular direction and suddenly, they made this bizarre announcement," said Grace, whose father, V.P.R. Nathan, 58, was a DCA man himself, working in the air traffic management section.
Anne Daisy frequently travelled to be with her Beijing-based husband. On March 8, Grace was in England when she received a call at her university. Naturally, she thought it was her mother, calling to tell she had arrived safely in Beijing. But instead, it was her father on the other line, asking her to take the first flight home.
“It was the longest, most excruciating 15 hours of my life," she told Astro AWANI.
Grace and Nathan went to the airport and the hotel where MH370 families gathered. They were there for just five minutes before deciding to wait at home; the situation was too chaotic. The Internet published a lot more information than the officials.
And their endless wait, ended when the announcement was eventually made. Or so they thought. Grace, her father and her sister, Azelia Shalini, 22, were disappointed.
"It's just the way they did the announcement... I don’t know, maybe they could've delivered the message in a more respectful way? Maybe?" Grace asked.
Looking back, the law student remembers her mother as the most dedicated woman who has made every imaginable sacrifice for the family.
Although Anne Daisy has left home for a year now, Grace, her sister and father never considered her as gone. For the family, Anne Daisy is away on a long vacation and will be back in due time.
"I have never once felt that she's gone forever. We live our lives as if she's coming back. We've not moved any of her things – for us, nothing has changed," said Grace.
Linawati Adnan
Sun Mar 08 2015
A year on, the next-of-kin share their fondest memories of their loved ones and the tormenting wait they had to endure.
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