Malaysian manhood in danger from prancing poncies?

MALAYSIAN macho-men mentality cowered under an unlikely assault over the weekend. Not from a horde of Latin lotharios putting their software skills hacking into ATM machines at some corner lot bank.

Rather, their inadequacies were exposed by a trio of pussy-footing, pale-faced poncies who get away with lip-synching and miming to music that is the stock-in-trade of the KPOP juggernaut.

As with all Kpop performers, this outfit is identified by an instantly forgettable combination of alphabet and numbers that nail the lie that a pop group needs an inventive name to scale the ladder of musical success. So it is that this group goes by the silly name B1A4; but don’t you dare diss them in front of their hordes of fans; especially tudung-clad Malaysian ones.

They may fail in the name game, but they shine in the estimation of their adoring legions. What they lack in musicality or originality, they more than make up for it slick choreography and showmanship.

Above all, the male Kpopers are, to a man - irritatingly beautiful; to the point of being androgynously effeminate! Somehow, this does not put off their zillions of female fans; and I dare show you some male ones at that!

So when some of B1A4’s Malaysian fans were invited for a sing-a-long on stage during a concert, all decorum got thrown out of the window.

The girls were subjected to a limp hug from their heroes for which they readily reciprocated rather more vigorously in return.

UNION OF THE WILLING

Now if the girls were non-consensual, such an act could be classed as illegal assault and battery. But these girls paid for their ticket and entered into an implied contract that seeing and touching were part of the deal - no?

This being the era of the instant tweet and immediate posting on FB, their deed of eastern derring do went viral the moment someone hit SEND.

The moral police went into overdrive. They took offence for the fans who subjected themselves to such indignity were wearing the tudung – the muslim headwear worn by post-pubescent Muslim girls and female adults.

Those who willingly observe this dress code, would in normal circumstances; follow all the religious practices, dos and donts rather strictly. They would be expected to wear loose fitting clothes that hide the female form.

The level of conformity varies according to willpower, faith and endurance. Many fail to follow this edict to the letter and one sees plenty of instances where the adherence is less-than-all-embracing.

So you do find young women wearing the tudung but put on short-sleeved teeshirts and figure-hugging pants.

A woman’s aurat in Islam (that part of the body that should not be exposed) includes all parts of the body except the face. Inappropriate exposure of the voice is also considered abuse of the aurat.

It follows that the co-ed mixing of guys and gals is strictly forbidden, so is close contact or proximity with the opposite sex. Physical interaction, as well as any form of intimacy, it goes without saying, is a NO; NO!

So when the girls threw away their eastern inhibitions and melted under the pull of Kimchi charm, it was not going to be long before all hell broke loose. Calls were made to punish. Others sternly ordered the girls involved to repent. The organiser quickly apologised.

The most memorable response came from Youth and Sports minister Khairy Jamaluddin.

He cheekily tweeted how the girls could have displayed better taste opting for someone who was tall, dark and hensem (sic), rather than pale, prissy and poncey. KJ is nothing if not sporting – he had been looking in the mirror that Monday morning! Bully for you Mr Minister!

While we are on KJ wearing his heart out on his sleeves; another tweet of his mirrored the general mood surrounding the march of millions down the Place de la Republique in Paris at about the same time the Kpop caper took place.

The march attracted so many politicians whose own hands are bathed in blood for atrocities perpetrated under the guise of nationalism, religious zealotry and racial supremacy and lets call a spade a spade ; Zionist bigotry.

One in the crowd gained the reputation as the Butcher of Beirut while someone who stood at the other end stands accused of having emasculated democracy – and the whole world knows who they are.

KJ used the word memualkan (nauseating) to describe the stomach-churning picture that made all the front pages on Monday morning as the minister was about to dig into his bowl of cornflakes.

Ostensibly, they marched to express their abhorrence at the actions of so-called IS militants in the two siege incidents in Paris over the weekend. I want to puke too!

All you Kpoppers out there – all is forgiven!