FOR Valentine’s Day, some couples only roll their eyes at each other in mutual cynicism. The capitalisation of love in the modern world can certainly seem banal.
But Valentine’s Day gifts are hardly a contemporary invention. People have been celebrating the day and gifting love tokens for hundreds of years.
We should first turn to Geoffrey Chaucer, the 14th-century poet, civil servant and keen European traveller. Chaucer’s poem from the 1380s, The Parliament of Fowls, is held to be the first reference to February 14 as a day about love.
This day was already a feast day of several mysterious early Roman martyred Saint Valentines, but Chaucer described it as a day for people to choose their lovers. He knew that was easier said than done.
The narrator of the poem is unsuccessful in love, despairing that life is short compared with how long it takes to learn to love well. He falls asleep and dreams of a garden in which all the different birds of the world have gathered.
Nature explains to the assembled flocks that, like every year on St Valentine’s Day, they have come to pick their partners in accordance with her rules. But this process causes confusion and debate: the birds can’t agree what it means to follow her rules because they all value different things in their partners.
Like today, in Chaucer’s time gift-giving could be highly ritualised and symbolise intention and commitment. In Old and Middle English, a “wed” was any sort of token pledged to guarantee a promise. It was not until the 13th century that a “wedding” came to mean a nuptial ceremony.
The same period saw marriage transform into a Christianised and unbreakable commitment (a sacrament of the Church). New conventions of love developed in songs, stories and other types of art.
These conventions influenced broader cultural ideas of emotion: love letters were written, grand acts of service were celebrated, and tokens of love were given.
Rings, brooches, girdles (belts), gloves, gauntlets (sleeves), kerchiefs or other personalised textiles, combs, mirrors, purses, boxes, vessels and pictures – and even fish – are just some examples of romantic gifts recorded from the late middle ages.
In stories, gifts could be imbued with magical powers. In the 13th century, in a history of the world, Rudolf von Ems recorded how Moses, when obliged to return home and leave his first wife Tharbis, an Ethiopian princess, had two rings made.
The one he gave her would cause Tharbis to forget him. He always wore its pair which kept her memory forever fresh in his mind.
Outside of stories, gifts could have legal significance: wedding rings, important from the 13th century, could prove that a marriage had occurred by evidencing the intention and consent of the giver and recipient.
Like Chaucer, 20th-century German psychologist Erich Fromm thought people could learn the art of loving. Fromm thought love was an act of giving not just material things, but one’s joy, interest, understanding, knowledge, humour and sadness.
While these gifts might take some time and practice, there are more straightforward ideas from history. Manufactured cards have dominated since the industrial revolution, taking their place alongside other now traditional presents such as flowers, jewellery, intimate apparel and consumables (now more often chocolates than fish). All can be personalised for that intimate touch.
There have, of course, been weirder examples of love gifts, such as Angelina Jolie and Billy Bob Thornton exchanging necklaces with silver pendants smeared with each other’s blood.
Artist Dora Maar was so upset when her notoriously bad lover Pablo Picasso complained about having to trade a painting for a ruby ring she immediately threw the ring in the Seine. Picasso soon replaced it with another, this one featuring Maar’s portrait.
A good love token can long outlast the feelings that prompt its giving: a flower pressed in a book, a trinket at the bottom of a box, a fading heartfelt card or a bittersweet song that jolts you back to an earlier time. In this way, the meaning of gifts can change as they become reminders that all things pass.
This article is provided by The Conversation via Reuters.
Reuters
Tue Feb 14 2023
The capitalisation of love in the modern world can certainly seem banal. - ETX Studio
COP29 climate summit draft proposes rich countries pay $250 billion per year
The draft finance deal criticised by both developed and developing nations.
Bomb squad sent to London's Gatwick Airport after terminal evacuation
This was following the discovery of a suspected prohibited item in luggage.
Kelantan urges caution amidst northeast monsoon rains
Kelantan has reminded the public in the state to refrain from outdoor activities with the arrival of the Northeast Monsoon season.
Former New Zealand PM Jacinda Ardern receives UN leadership award
Former New Zealand prime minister Jacinda Ardern was given a global leadership award by the United Nations Foundation.
ICC'S arrest warrants for Netanyahu, Gallant an apt decision - PM
The decision of the ICC to issue arrest warrants against Benjamin Netanyahu and Yoav Gallant is apt, said Datuk Seri Anwar Ibrahim.
KTMB provides two additional ETS trains for Christmas, school holidays
KTMB will provide two additional ETS trains for the KL Sentral-Padang Besar route and return trips in conjunction with the holidays.
BNM'S international reserves rise to USD118 bil as at Nov 15, 2024
Malaysia's international reserves rose to US$118.0 billion as at Nov 15, 2024, up from US$117.6 billion on Oct 30, 2024.
Findings by dark energy researchers back Einstein's conception of gravity
The findings announced are part of a years-long study of the history of the cosmos focusing upon dark energy.
NRES responds to Rimbawatch press release on COP29
The Ministry of Natural Resources and Environmental Sustainability (NRES) wishes to offer the following clarifications to the issues raised.
Online Safety Bill and Anti-Cyberbullying Laws must carefully balance rights and protections
The Online Safety Advocacy Group (OSAG) stands united with people in Malaysia in the fight against serious online harms.
Malaysia's inflation at 1.9 pct in Oct 2024 - DOSM
Malaysia's inflation rate for October 2024 has increased to 1.9 per cent, up from 1.8 per cent in September this year.
Saudi Arabia showcases Vision 2030 goals at Airshow China 2024
For the first time, Saudi Arabia is participating in the China International Aviation & Aerospace Exhibition held recently in Zhuhai.
King Charles' coronation cost GBP 71mil, govt accounts show
The coronation of Britain's King Charles cost taxpayers GBP72 million (US$90 million), official accounts have revealed.
Couple and associate charged with trafficking 51.9 kg of meth
A married couple and a man were charged in the Magistrate's Court here today with trafficking 51.974 kilogrammes of Methamphetamine.
PDRM to consult AGC in completing Teoh Beng Hock investigation
The police may seek new testimony from existing witnesses for additional insights into the investigation of Teoh Beng Hock's death.
Thai court rejects petition over ex-PM Thaksin's political influence
Thailand's Constitutional Court rejects a petition seeking to stop Thaksin Shinawatra from interfering in the running the Pheu Thai party.
Abidin takes oath of office as Sungai Bakap assemblyman
The State Assemblyman for Sungai Bakap, Abidin Ismail, was sworn in today at the State Assembly building, Lebuh Light.
UPNM cadet officer charged with injuring junior, stomping on him with spike boots
A cadet officer at UPNM pleaded not guilty to a charge of injuring his junior by stomping on the victim's stomach with spike boots.
How Indian billionaire Gautam Adani's alleged bribery scheme took off and unraveled
The indictment was unsealed on Nov. 20, prompting a $27 billion plunge in Adani Group companies' market value.
Elon Musk blasts Australia's planned ban on social media for children
Several countries have already vowed to curb social media use by children through legislation, but Australia's policy could become one of the most stringent.